Gay sex in the jail

At one, being gay was something celebrated. People will turn on you in an instant if they think it will benefit them.

The depictions of what they show on TV and in movies of same sex prisoner relationships wasn’t what I experienced. When it does happen, it’s super-fast and usually very basic (oral or hand). Six of the 73 reported having been raped at least once during their confinement, but almost all inmates say that most sex is consensual.

Failure to do so discourages reporting abuse and thereby encourages more abuse. Three others had been threatened with rape by other prisoners.

“Quite simply, what happened ruined my life,” said one. Most (45) said the participants would receive a disciplinary write-up and would be moved separately to higher security units for 30 days or more.

A minority reported more lenient responses: just admonishing them to quit (8), pretending not to see (4), or watching voyeuristically and saying nothing (2). In high security facilities, LGBT prisoners are often grouped. We received 73 responses, several of them coming from other prisoners who were not previously enrolled in our program, but had an interest in talking about the issue.

Some prisoners tell us that two inmates will arrange to skip a meal and remain behind in the dormitory while everyone else is in the mess hall. The simple answer is yes BUT it’s not like the type of boyfriend you might think about on the outside.

First, the relationships are almost always kept on the DL, even if you are openly gay. Worse, I feared that because I was a gay man, I’d be an easy target for abuse.

“Should I butch it up?

NOMS policy, however, is that men who are known, or are discovered, to be in a sexual relationship are not allowed to share a cell and will be separated.

One interviewee reported that a senior officer had moved a young prisoner, who had confided he was “confused” about his sexuality, into the cell of an openly gay, older prisoner, in order to help him “sort himself out”.

Play your cards right and you can benefit from it. Despite their straight partners’ paranoia about exposure, many gays enjoy gossiping among themselves about which straight men they have “turned out.”

Reactions to Gays and Gay Sex in the Prison Environment

Inmates were asked how the corrections officers respond if they come upon inmates involved in consensual sex.

Don’t expect good bedside manner from them.

As a gay man, I prided myself in my pearly whites. The third and most likely scenario was that I would be moved again. The Commission has conducted the first systematic review of sex in prison and it is clear important lessons must be learned, and fast.”

Notes to editors

1. The Commission on Sex in Prison’s fifth and final briefing paper, Sex in prison: Experiences of former prisoners, can be downloaded here.
2. The Commission on Sex in Prison has received written and oral evidence from voluntary and statutory agencies, prison governors and serving prisoners.

   Other facilities have bunk beds in hallways. Prison officials understandably want to minimize inmate privacy, because hidden spaces that might be used for sex could also be used for other proscribed activities, such as drugs.

   One might assume that gay and bi-sexual men are those most likely to pursue sex in prison, but it is well known that men who were entirely straight in their outside lives will also seek release with identifiably gay or trans inmates.

   Other inmates comment on their experiences giving them a better understanding of gender fluidity, hypersexuality, and compulsive behaviors; many say that what they have seen in prison will make them more cautious about safe sex and avoiding casual hook-ups. Those who report rapes are commonly considered “snitches,” but some inmates say this name should only apply to people who report sexual activity in which they are not personally involved.

   But compared to what I thought the food was going to be like (gruel) I must say meals weren’t as horrible as I had thought.

   6. Others complain about receiving overly intimate pat-downs by female or gay male guards.

   

   But I could deal with that.

   My cellmate was a rough dude, the kind of guy who hated anyone who was not like him.